How to cope with difficult emotions and go back to your center

Tuesday June 6th, 2023
How to cope with difficult emotions and go back to your center

“You helped me get back to my center, to reconnect with my authentic self and positive energy. This is something very special for you. I have not met a coach with your capacity to work with difficult emotions” a client said to me recently.

And yes, this is one of my superpowers in my coaching and I love to help people:

  • Overcome their difficult emotions like: anger, frustration, shame, guilt, worries, fears, hopelessness, emotional pain, sadness, loneliness, emptiness, willingness for punishing other people, etc.
  • And get back to their center, reconnecting with positive feelings like: love, joy, happiness, calmness, gratitude, inspiration, passion, feeling alive, etc.

We as humans create emotional attachments to people and situations which make us feel stuck, provoking a sensation for a very difficult situation. And we could start seeing things as “black and white” losing our center, inner balance and authenticity.

People usually say that there is no place for emotions in business. Yes, for the artificial intellect there is no emotions, but we are humans. And we have emotions! This is what make us humans!

We all need human connections in business and life. But human connections create emotions that impacts all areas in our life. That is why we need to appreciate them and to learn how to cope with them.

Actually, the situations are neutral. They are as they are. We give meanings to them.

  • And the meaning we give creates the emotional state.
  • The meaning we give also prevent us from seeing the situation from the shoes of the other person.
  • The truth is always 50:50. It is never only ours. And we need to take responsibility for our 50 percent in the interactions with others. Only parents have a 100 percent responsibility in the communication with their children. But usually we blame other people for the whole situation and our emotional states, because:
  • We get attached to our meaning and to our emotions. This is our ego. Our ego is not our center. And our ego doesn’t allow us to take responsibilities for how we feel.

Or center is our emotional stable and authentic self that is connected with love and empathy to ourselves and others, keeping healthy boundaries in the same time.

But we cannot change the situation and create something different until we change our meaning we have given to it. And we cannot change our meaning for the situation while we keep staying in the same difficult emotions.

  • Once we decide to release the emotions, everything changes for a second.
  • The situation IS NOT changing. Our ATTITUDE is changing and our EMOTIONA STATE is changing.
  • From this position we can start acting differently and creating new things and relationships in business and life.

As an NLP Somatic coach, I help people walk through this process fast and create new behavior, solutions and results they want in their business, leadership style and life using the process described below. And I love to do it. The results of my clients give me huge sense of fulfillment.

It is NOT a therapy. We DON’T explore the past intellectually. We can release the emotions without exploring the past at all. We can do it in the current moment very easy and fast. Or if the situation is very very difficult, we could go in the past for a while but not for discussing it, rather for releasing the feelings that had been created in the past and for freeing up this part of us that is stuck and generates hard feelings.

This is how the transformation happens working with me (You can go through this process alone, but for maximum results it is good if someone experienced, like me, lead you in it):

  1. We explore the situation that create difficult emotions and disbalance in the client.
  2. I hold the space for them to reconnect with the difficult emotions for a while and acknowledge them. This is very important step – to feel the emotions, not to avoid them. We need to face them, to see them, to feel them in order to release them. Sometimes it is very painful and people don’t want to meet with these emotions. In such cases, my advice is to find someone to support you during this phase. And this is what I do for my clients.
  3. Than using special NLP and somatic tools which I choose depending on the different cases, I help people release the emotions and to see the situation from a neutral position. Here the most important thing is to lead the person in this process to a constructive direction, to hold the space in a way that the clients DO NOT loose themselves in the emotions and to lead them to a positive direction.
  4. After they entered in the neutral position in mind, heart and body, I invite them to see the situation from the neutral position and to decide how they want to continue: do they need to carry these feelings with them or not, and what new behavior they want to have. It is up to the client to decide whether they want to take the difficult feelings back or to release them fully. Every time people choose to release the difficult emotions fully and to reconnect with joy, love, empathy, gratitude or other positive feelings that serves them better.
  5. So we continue to work with the difficult emotions until they are fully released and then we work on connecting with the positive feelings the clients have chosen, and then to create the new things that they want to have in their business, leadership style or in life caring the positive feelings inside. The results are fast and amazing. But most important the transformation has lasting effect.

Working with me, my clients not only release their difficult emotions, but they also:

  • Learn new patterns how to cope with similar situations in the future in a constructive way that will not hurt them again.
  • Reconnect with love and empathy to themselves and other people.
  • We build new healthy boundaries together.
  • We work on creating empathic communication style that becomes natural for them, using it with ease, enjoying the new positive results from it.
  • All this help them create completely new experience and new type of connection with people.

If you like this and if you feel this is for you, I invite you to connect with me to explore your challenges together, getting your first results.

Contact me for a FREE 30-minute DISCUVERY CALL

  • This is a free talk to see if I am the right coach for you. We are going to explore your challenges using coaching tools. You will have your first results and you will experience coaching with me. 
  • This is for both of us to learn more about each other, your challenges, and how I can support you.
  • Based on this conversation, we are going to decide whether we are going to work together.
  • This conversation DOES NOT oblige you anything. It is for both of us to know each other better and to see whether we would like to work together. Coaching is a partnership. That is why it is very important that both of us think we are a good match for it. We can learn it only if we meet. This is the purpose of this call.

To register for your 30-minute free talk with me, please fill in the form below:

  • Enter your name and email,
  • Please describe shortly the challenges you are facing and your motivation for solving them.

I will answer you within 2 working days.

    *Signing up for this session I agree to join the Newsletter of Ivet Pavlova Business & Leadership coach for receiving free updates for coaching proposals and useful information. I understand that I can unsubscribe through the option “Unsubscribe” which is available at the end of any email I receive from I understand that my personal data will be kept confidential according to the Privacy Policy and subscribing herein I agree with this policy.





    What else would you like to learn about this topic? What are your challenges that you want to address? Please ask your questions or write your comments here. I will answer you within two working days.

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    Въведете сумата 5+4 =